Good Chodesh
“Cameron!” called Mayor McGillicuddy, looking up from a document. “Come here! I need you!”
“Yes sir?” the mayor’s assistant said, rushing into the mayor’s office.
“What’s today’s date?” Mayor McGillicuddy asked.
“It’s the twelfth, sir.”
“Thank you, Cameron.” Mayor McGillicuddy said, returning to the papers on his desk.
“Cameron!” the mayor called again. “Come here! I need you!”
“How can I help you, sir?” said Cameron, returning to the office.
“How many days are in this month?”
“Thirty-one, sir,” Cameron said.
“But I thought April has thirty days,” said Mayor McGillicuddy.
“We’re in March, sir,” Cameron replied.
“March comes before April this year?” asked the mayor, looking confused.
“Just like every year,” Cameron said with a smile.
“WHAT???” Mayor McGillicuddy’s face turned red in anger. “EVERY YEAR? And you’re only telling me NOW???”
“But sir, I didn’t… I thought… sir, I never…”
“I don’t want to hear it,” the mayor said, waving his hand in annoyance. “That’s it. From now on, in University City, we are to have no more months!”
“Sir?” Cameron asked. “What do you mean by that?”
“I mean, that by the power vested in me, by my authority as mayor of University City, I do hereby proclaim that as of this day, the… uh… Cameron?”
“Yes sir?”
“What day of the year is it?”
“It’s March twelfth, sir.”
Mayor McGillicuddy started turning red. “Did I not just say I am getting rid of months? Do you not listen when I am speaking, Cameron?”
“No, no sir, of course you did sir… I mean yes… I do listen…” Cameron stammered.
“So what day of the year is it?” demanded the mayor.
Cameron did a quick calculation in his head. “It’s the seventy-first day of the year.”
“Thank you.”
Mayor McGillicuddy stood up straight, grabbed a bullhorn and walked to the open window.
“To all residents of University City!” the mayor bellowed through the bullhorn. “By the power vested in me, by my authority as mayor of University City, I do hereby proclaim that as of this day, the seventy-first day of two thousand twenty six, there are no more months!”
The next several days were confusing for the residents of University City. It was difficult to get adjusted to just counting the days of the year.
“Mr. Mayor?” Cameron said, poking his head into the mayor’s office.
“Yes, Cameron?” said Mayor McGillicuddy, leaning back in his large plush leather chair, glancing up at the massive picture of him hanging on the wall behind him.
“I didn’t receive my paycheck yesterday.”
“That’s strange,” said the mayor. “When do you usually receive it?”
“Well I used to receive it on the first and fifteenth of every month,” Cameron answered.
“No more months!” Mayor McGillicuddy warned.
“Yes, I know, but today, the seventy-fifth day of the year, would have been March 16. So I should have been paid yesterday.”
“That’s not a problem,” said the mayor. “We’ll just pay everyone on the first and fifteenth of the year, instead of the month – WAIT! Did you say that today would have been March 16th?”
“Yes sir.”
“But my BIRTHDAY! March 14th is the mayor’s birthday, the greatest holiday in University City! Oh no! What have I done??? Quick, Cameron! Come with me!”
Mayor McGillicuddy grabbed his bullhorn and hurried off into the street, bellowing “Months are hereby reinstated! And by municipal decree, I do hereby declare that my birthday shall henceforth be on March twenty first!”
*
“Mr. Notowitch,” said Arnold Perel, as the two men stood outside of the shul, watching in amusement. “It’s funny that this silliness happened right by the week of Parshas Hachodesh.”
“I agree,” Lewis Notowitch replied. “Especially because Parshas Hachodesh teaches us how important months are. Although, of course, our months are holy months given to us by Hashem.”
“Yes,” agreed Arnold. “But aside from the holiness of the Jewish months themselves, the very fact that our years are broken up into months is so important!”
“I know!” Lewis said. “I was just telling my grandchildren at the Shabbos table, every time we have a Rosh Chodesh, we need to think ‘wow, another month has passed! Time isn’t standing still! Thank you, Hashem for another month of life! And we need to make sure we’re spending each month growing in our relationship with Hashem!’”
“Isn’t it geshmak to be a Yid?” said Arnold. “Only Yidden get together and say Hallel once a month in thanks to Hashem for giving us another month of life!”
Have a Wonderful Shabbos!
Let’s review:
- Why are months important?
- How have you grown closer to Hashem this month?
