Q:
Is there such a thing as being too picky when looking for a wife? Shouldn’t someone be able to choose what is right for him so that they can be happy?
A:
I remember a young man I knew who was very picky. So I asked him, “How many girls did you go out with already?” “One hundred girls,” he tells me. A hundred girls! So I told him, “Something is wrong with you. If out of those one hundred girls, you couldn’t find at least ten girls to fall in love with, then something is wrong.”
Hakodosh Boruch Hu made girls so that men should fall in love with them and therefore it doesn’t take that long to find the right one. Certainly you should choose the one you like. Of course! Why not? But you cannot continue looking forever. When you reach the age of twenty-five, then it’s already time to have made a decision. Even earlier – but today, twenty-five is the cut-off time. At that point, you should stop choosing. Just close your eyes and listen to the advice that other people are telling you. And if people who are capable are telling you, “This is a fine girl. She’s healthy. She comes from a good family. She’s idealistic,” then just go ahead and leap without looking.
TAPE # 630 (February 1987)
