Should a boy have any friendship with girls?
Now that question really is superfluous. The answer is N-O, no! That’s all. And the truth is not only no friendship; there should be no kirvah at all. No kind of closeness at all. You shouldn’t stop on the street to talk to a girl. If he meets a girl on the street and he wants to fulfill the mitzvah of being mekabel es kol adam beseiver panim yafos, no; it doesn’t apply to girls.
I was once, about forty years ago, in a country place with Satmarer chassidim, and we were saying kinos on Tisha Ba’av. So I said to chossid who was next to me, “The ladies out there are too far away. They can’t hear the kinos.” He said to me, “They’re not far away enough. The further away they are the better they are.” A piece of wisdom I heard from him.
Now don’t think he’s downgrading the ladies. No. He’s not scorning the ladies; but he recognizes the truth of nature. And don’t deceive yourself.
There’s a chapter in Shulchan Aruch that’s titled, “Lehisrachek min hanashim – keep away from women.” And women keep away from men. And that’s an ironclad rule. It’s a common sense rule. And once upon a time even lihavdil the goyim understood that themselves. That’s how important it is.
TAPE # 867