Q:
What’s the best program for training myself to think Torah thoughts?
A:
That’s a good question. And one answer is, if you’ll take the Sefer Chovos Halevavos, the part called Shaar Cheshbon Hanefesh, a certain section, you’ll see there that he gives us thirty subjects to think on. Most people don’t know about this. Thirty subjects to think on and practice on them.
Now some of them at first might seem boring, not interesting at all, but start concentrating on them and after a while you’ll see that it’s not so simple and you’ll gain a great deal.
For instance, one of the very first ones is to think how lucky you are that Hashem created you out of nothing. You could have been a tree. Just think of that cheshbon. You could have been a tree! The same materials that go into a tree make a human being. You could have been a cat! And Hashem made you into a human being.
Now start thinking about that. At first you’ll say “It’s boring; there is nothing to think about. Mai kamashma lan, what’s it telling us.”
No, think about it. Imagine yourself walking in the street, stopping at the gutter, licking up some muddy water, attempting to find something in the garbage cans. And now, all of a sudden you become a you. Ooohhh wah! What a difference that is! That’s one of the cheshbonos.
Now little by little you think from one thing after another and then you come to the thirtieth cheshbon. The thirtieth cheshbon is that there is nobody in the world except you and Hashem. So think about that. All your life you’re among strangers. Even your wife and your children, they’re strangers. Someday you’ll say goodbye to everybody. You’ll be left alone in this world and you’ll come to the Next World; you’re a גר בארץ נכריה, a stranger in a strange land.
They’ll say, “What are you doing here?”
You say, “I’m looking for Hashem.”
You’ll knock on the door in the Next World; you’re all alone.
And so you have to get accustomed in this world to being in the company of Hashem. And therefore you should get into practice while you’re still alive, הצנע לכת עם אלוקיך – to walk secretly with Hashem (Michah 6:8).
Did you ever practice walking secretly with Hashem? Try it. If you’re young still, you might listen to me. The older one is a wise guy, he won’t listen. But the young ones might listen to me. As you’re walking in the street say, “I’m going to walk from here to the next telegraph pole and I’m going to think only about You, Hashem.”
Try it; it’s not so easy. Think about Hashem quietly; nobody knows about it. You’re a great man! When you think about important things you become important. When you think about important things you become important! At that moment, as you’re walking from here to the telegraph pole, you’re as tall as the telegraph pole. You’re taller than anybody else because you have the most important thoughts on your mind.
And so hamashlim hashloshim – if you went through all the thirty cheshbonos and finally you’re working on the last one that Hashem and you are together alone in the world. גר אנכי בארץ״ – I’m a stranger in this world. Hashem, I’m all by myself! You’re the only One Who can help me. The money I have in the bank won’t help me. My rich father in law won’t help me. Nobody will help me. You’re the only One who can help me. גר אנכי בארץ.”
And when you learn that you are already making progress in this world.
So therefore that’s one place where you can find food for thought. It’s not the only place however.
April 1993
