Q:
Would you say that the future success of a person in avodas Hashem is dependent on him fostering deep family attachments as a child?
A:
And the answer is no. Deep family attachments are an aid to a child but it’s certainly not a necessity. In the days of old, that means up to a hundred years ago, very many boys left home; they left their families. הוי גולה למקום תורה. Many went to other towns and studied Torah and they hardly ever came back again. They married in those towns and almost never came back.
Family attachments are only important after you’re married. After you marry you have to have a family attachment and responsibility to your wife and to your children. That’s part of a man’s shleimus.
Of course, כבד את אביך ואת אמך; no question that honoring your father and mother is a fundamental form of perfection. But very many people never even saw their parents. They were orphaned and still they gained perfection without that. So although it certainly is useful, it’s not a sine qua non that it must be utilized in order to gain shleimus.
TAPE # 434