How long should a couple wait between the engagement and the chasuna?
As soon as possible. מצוה הבאה לידך אל תחמיצנה – “When the opportunity to do a mitzvah comes to your hand, don’t delay”. I’ll tell you what an odom gadol, a big rosh yeshiva, once told me. He said it doesn’t pay to wait. And he explained why. It’s like taking pills, he said. The pills are good for you. But you have to swallow them quickly. Once you start chewing them and tasting them, you see that they’re bitter and you might spit them out.
Now, this shidduch is good for you. But make sure not to taste it too much. Swallow it as soon as possible. Because if you start tasting it, then you might decide, “That’s not for me,” and then you’ll keep on looking for the next forty years.
TAPE # 999 (February 1995)