Q:
If somebody criticizes me saying that I behaved contrary to the halacha, and now I asked somebody who knows and I discovered that I was right the whole time and he was the one who made a mistake.
Should I tell him that he was wrong?
A:
Keep quiet. ונפשי כעפר לכל תהיה – “And my soul, my emotions, should be like dust to all those who insult me.” You say it every day a few times. It wouldn’t be that bad if you did it once in a while as well.
So you’ll ask me, doesn’t that person have to know where he made a mistake so that he can correct himself? Of course it would be a benefit for him if you would tell him he was wrong. But it’s a bigger benefit for yourself not to say anything. So, be selfish. Give the benefit to yourself! נפשי כעפר לכל תהיה. It’s a tremendous zechus; don’t give it up so easily. כל הבולם פיו בשעת מריבה – If a person closes his mouth when there’s a quarrel; let’s say someone starts getting angry at you and you keep quiet. You should know that תולה ארץ על בלימה – the whole world hangs on the zechus of the one who is keeping his mouth closed. So big is the zechus, it’s a tremendous opportunity. Don’t look for it, but if it happened, somebody attacks you suddenly, wooo, out of nowhere he had some sharp words for you, and you keep quiet. You keep your mouth closed. “Oh,” Hakadosh Baruch Hu says, “That’s a tremendous zechus. תולה ארץ על בלימה. The world is being supported by you.
TAPE # E-44 (December 1995)
