How can someone who is constantly sad because they have no children, be thankful to Hashem?
And the answer is, the Chovos Halevovos says that if you are one of the privileged ones who has no children, you should thank Hashem always. You should be grateful that He absolved you from the obligation of children.
Now pay attention. What do we need children for? Are we little girls that we need baby dolls? Something to play with? It’s irrational and it’s selfish; that’s what children are for?! Children are given to us by Hashem as a responsibility. However it’s our job not to dodge it. Certainly you have to marry young and have as many as you can because that’s Hakodosh Boruch Hu’s command: Pru u’revu, you must do that. And as they come and the obligations come upon you, you’re going crazy already from one child, so go crazy from ten; it’s the same thing. It’s a big mistake; women think if they have more they’ll go crazy. I’ve seen women who claim they are crazy from one baby. So you might as well go crazy over a lot.
But suppose Hakodosh Boruch Hu didn’t give you any – it’s silly for a person to waste her life or his life in sadness. On the contrary, breathe a sigh of relief, like the Chovos Halevovos says, and be grateful – now you can go ahead and accomplish the great things in life. How many women have time to read a Kuzari, or to read the Chovos Halevovos? You can read it in translation too. A woman cam become great now that she has no children. If she’s not of that bent of mind, to learn seforim, so she can become great in gemilas chassodim. There are careers in helping other people. A lot of things to do that mothers of families cannot do. Now, mothers of families תבוא עליהם ברכה, blessed should they be with all their chores, and certainly Hakodosh Boruch Hu will reward them. But the Chovos Halevovos says, you should thank Hashem when you have no children because He has exonerated you from those obligations and now you can do a lot of things that people with children cannot do.
And don’t waste your life mourning because that shows that you don’t understand the purpose of life. The purpose of life is to serve Hakodosh Boruch Hu. How do you serve Him? In whatever manner He requires of you. So if He deposits children on your doorstep, so that’s what He requires of you. And if He doesn’t, so He requires other things and there’s so many requirements in life that there’s never any spare time. Never do you have any leisure times to take off from avodas Hashem. And people should always be busy in serving Hashem in one way or the other. To utilize life’s purpose, whether it’s by raising children, or whether by raising somebody else’s children, or by raising money for people to have children, or by raising your mind to heights of avodas Hashem.
TAPE # 457